Is it better to know or not to know...?

So, is it better to know or not to know behind the scene things?  I had a chance to debrief with a friend and found out that I didn't bomb so horribly, in fact, things were looking super good until the last person came in.  In this instance, there was no competition...she was bound to shine, and that's okay because I've multiple times to shine in my life....and multiple times to bomb :)  Lately, I've been bombing more than shinning but that's kind of where life is at right now.  To find out that I actually did decent was surprising.  Then the other part to this, is knowing that I was this close...this close to something huge. Which in itself does suck to know I was this close...So is life...so is life, right now.

It's been a long week and I'm looking forward to the weekend and next week.  We are spending part of the weekend camping with some friends where we are taking over a Jellystone Park, no lie...there's going to be a massive party (but in a good way).  We were joking with friends that we need the T-shirts that note "2014 Jellystone Take Over".  Then the other part of the weekend is that we are headed off to Traverse City on the company dime.  I have a four day conference next week where I get to be surrounded by greatness.  I get to spend some quality time with some of my closest former co-workers so I'm super excited.  I just have to tell myself "Don't cry Kellie".  It's bad because every time I see someone from Grand Rapids, I just start to cry.  I can't help it but I miss their daily presence in life.  Heck, I'm even crying right now writing this post.  I just have this swirling emotion of missing my friends.  To spend 12 years with people in the trenches, only to move on is kind of hard for me.  I just miss them...and I can't wait to see them.  I just keep on telling myself, I can do this...I can do this...which I can but it's just not fun.

I'm wearing the 3 Dots Dress from Gwynnie Bee.  I am so expanding my tastes right now.  I have to say that this has been one of my favorite dresses ever.  I usually avoid anything with stripes but all I can say is "oh yes!!!"  It's made in the USA and it's super comfy :)